Step 2 in creating your Life Plan is to recognize that the best investments we can make during our lifetime is the investment in loving relationships. A person may accumulate vast amounts of money and material possessions, but if he reaches the end of his life without friends and loved ones around him, he dies a poor man. Listen as I walk you through another dream sequence that focuses on relationships and hearing the voices of your past:
- If you were on trial for the crime of being a kind and generous person, would there be enough evidence to convict you?
- People may not remember what you said or did, but they will always remember how you made them feel.
- Viktor Frankl used this method of looking at life with his fellow inmates who wanted to give up and commit suicide.
- I like this better than the approach used by Stephen Covey and Michael Gerber, where you imagine you are attending your own funeral. I don’t want you to visualize being dead! Wayne Dyer says “never allow any thought into your imagination that you don’t want to materialize”
- Imagine you are near the end of your life. You are still mentally sound, but your time to pass is near. You have gathered around you all of the people who have been close to you. Your spouse, children, grandchildren, other family, friends, neighbors, colleagues, pastors/priests/rabbis/religious leaders.
- This is an opportunity for the people you have gathered to talk to you. They are here to tell you about your life and the impact that you had on them.
- List the people: Spouse, children, brothers/sisters, friends, neighbors, colleagues/co-workers, religious leaders
- Dissociate from yourself and become that person. See yourself through that person’s eyes and feel the feelings that person has about you. As that person, start talking to you about your life. How you affected them. The difference you made. The help/encouragement you gave. The contribution you made. The security/safety you provided. The laughs and tears shared. These are the voices of the people from your life telling you about the difference you made in their lives.
- Write this conversation down. Script it out for each person you listed.
- The feelings are so important. If you are feeling insignificant, unimportant, let’s do this experiment. Go through this scenario in your mind–all the people telling you what an impact you made in their lives. Imagine what that will feel like when it happens. Can you feel it? How does it feel? Do you feel the joy, gratitude, love. Does it make you feel significant and important? Those feelings are real, just as real as they will be when it really happens to you. These feelings are available to you right now! You don’t have to wait for this event to happen. You can live each day with this feeling and doing so will produce the real relationships you are just now imagining.
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